Oh, right.

by eileen on February 6, 2012

We sleep on a king-sized mattress on the floor. Don’t ask, it’s a long story involving co-sleeping, trial-and-error, and musical beds–but it works for us. Between our “bed” and the wall is the mattress from Z’s laughably unused crib. On the other side of our bed is our dog’s bed.

Basically, we all sleep in one big pile on the floor in our tiny bedroom: Mama, Dada, toddler, dog. Our nightlight is an electronic candle flickering at the foot of the bed.

Last night I lay awake in the faux candlelight, listening to the breathing in the room around me. My husband mostly slow and even. The dog a deep low rumble. The baby soft and quick, punctuated by soft whimpers. I could pick each one out, like the strains of a symphony.

My own breath was silent, I could only hear it in my brain. I tried to follow it, to induce some relaxation-meditation. Chasing sleep.

The whole time thinking, this is it. This is the time when all four of us are breathing, alive and on this earth together. The planet will keep spinning and one by one we will no longer be here.

I know I sound like a high school goth poet, but frankly–death has been on my mind a lot lately. Our dog has cancer and is going to die soon. We lost a close family member in December.

There has been a lot of contact with the other side. A lot of wrinkles.

Zane’s birth made me think of death too. I don’t know if I am just morbid or if it’s only natural, to think of the end of life at the beginning. On the day he was born I kept thinking–here we are to witness the start of his life, who will be there when his life ends?

I hope I am not there, of course. But I want to reach through time and tell whoever is there, please be gentle with him, he is just a baby.

I keep thinking of that interview with Brene Brown…

Joy is the most vulnerable of all emotions.

What a fragile state, to love what is right now. To want to live in a moment forever.

I’m much more acquainted with longing: hoping that things will change, trying to have faith that things will get better.

I’m blindsided by the tender heartache of loving everything exactly as it is.

And so the healthy eating obsession. Could it be any more obvious? I can talk about wellness or compassion (or hello, vanity) but isn’t this all just an unspoken attempt to control our death? To push it back, to make it less painful if possible?

To try to add some to the number of days when we’re all here, breathing, on this earth together.

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Love Bites #4

by eileen on February 3, 2012

A weekly list of things I love and what’s going on with me.

Oh my goodness, I love where science meets the soul! So this interview with Brene Brown had me in tears. Really, it’s a manual for life as a human and a parent.

Because of my work, I know everyone has a story that will break your heart. Everyone is completely feeling isolated and alone and ‘less-than’ and those feelings are the one thing that we all share in common. I know there’s no mansion that I could pull up in front of, no perfect group of Junior League moms or no group of successful CEOs that I could ever look at in the eye and believe that there’s no brokenheartedness there.

and..

Emotions won’t kill you but not feeling them will. Our fear of emotion can absolutely kill us. Pain won’t kill us but numbing pain kills people every single day.

and…!

As it turns out, I am the patriarchy.

and…oh hell, just read it. You’ll be glad you did, I promise.

Did you read A Wrinkle in Time in elementary school in the 1980s like I did? If so, you might enjoy this article on how groundbreaking it was in so many ways. (Our cover was the second one on the first page of that article.)

Wow, that brings back memories. Sometimes I forget how into Sci-fi and fantasy I was at different points in my life. And then I find myself getting totally into Firefly and thinking…oh yeah, I am a total geek, I remember.

Today I’m taking my dog to acupuncture for the first time. Now there’s a sentence I never thought I’d write, but we want to do all we can for our best friend. I have so, so much more to say about holistic health and dogs but that will be another post!

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The Kind Diet

by eileen on February 1, 2012

Psst. Okay, here is where I let you all in on my secret adoration of Alicia Silverstone.

I must admit when I saw she had written a diet book, I may have rolled my eyes. Like I really needed to get diet advice from a skinny actress who probably never has to lift a finger, and has some personal chef and stuff. As if!

I’m not sure what finally convinced me to buy this book. It probably came up a few times as I worked my way through the rabbithole of research I went down after reading The China Study.

Anyway,  it turns out this book is the closest I have found to describing my dietary goals, and tying them together with concern for the environment and for animals. I have a huge girl-crush on Alicia now! (we are on a first-name basis in my head.)

Where The China Study was great inspiring epidemiological science, this book is like the next step to me–closer to home. More practical and holistic. But also more inspiring and heart-filled.

So it’s a diet book yes, but it’s mostly about a way of life filled with kindness.

You’ll either gag when you read it, or be totally inspired like I was :)

If you read it, let me know what you think! Or have you read it? What did you think?

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Wordless Wednesday: Walking!

by eileen on February 1, 2012

Taking a breath and calming the mental chatter once a week.

It’s official, the boy is full-on walking now. The toddler is toddling.

It’s not without risk. Here’s poor boo sporting a bump on his head from all of his adventures.

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Coffee Substitutes

by eileen on January 30, 2012

(I know, I know you’re never going to give up coffee, right? I hear ya. That is totally fine. You can just bookmark this for later–or um, never.)

I’m intimately acquainted with a deep, longtime love of caffeine. I used to regularly drink 20 ounces of black coffee every morning, and maybe a latte for a treat in the afternoon. Unfortunately our love affair was a doomed one…

Caffeine causes adrenal fatigue, messes with blood sugar and acid/alkaline balance, and it can deplete your body of all those hard-earned micronutrients you’re drinking in your smoothie every morning. Your body may handle these things just fine, or it may not.

I don’t say this as a way of convincing anyone of anything. I am not one to argue or push people around, and I think every day we each make the choice that’s best for us.

I say it because my thing is–while I think it’s totally okay when I don’t make the healthiest choices for my body, I don’t like fooling myself.

So, there was a long time at the beginning of my healthy eating journey where I could not conceive of giving up coffee. But to try to convince myself that it was okay or good for me would have been like lying to myself, or being purposefully ignorant. Instead I said:

This is not the best choice I could be making for my body, but it is the best choice I can make today.

And that was true…until one day it just wasn’t true.

I was ready.

Filling up my body with micronutrients helped me get ready. Finding substitutes helped even more.

I tried quite a few: Kristen of the Green Mommy Blog has a great roundup of coffee alternatives here. I love Teeccino. And I still enjoy a decaf (soy) latte every now and then when I’m out at a coffeeshop.

But for everyday at home?

My favorite!

Both for ease-of-making, health, and flavor, my favorite coffee substitute is a mix of powdered barley drink and raw cacao.  I know, it sounds complicated and weird—but I swear it is delicious, and faster than brewing coffee!

The “recipe”

Spoon about a tablespoon of barley drink powder and a tablespoon of raw cacao into a 16 oz. cup. Add almost (but not quite!*) boiling water. That’s it. Adjust the quantities to your taste, and depending on how big a cup you want. You don’t even need to stir.

(*) When the water is too hot the cacao gets clumpy.

Raw cacao

Cacao is actually beneficial for you in small doses (if you’re interested, read more about that here.) It is a phenomenal source of magnesium, as well as antioxidant flavinoids.

(Just don’t let any spill near your dog or let him get his nose in your unattended cup, this is the purest version of  ”chocolate is bad for dogs.”)

Make sure it is pure raw cacao, and not a cocoa powder with added sugar. I like Navitas Naturals brand quite a bit, although I have not tried many others.

Barley drink powder

There are two main brands: Pero and Inka. Both are just a mixture of powdered barley and other grains and herbs. Pero is my favorite of the two, but Inka is quite nice too. I like that they foam up a bit on top so I feel like I’m drinking a latte.

Bonus for nursing moms: barley is a galactagogue.

(Anti-bonus for the gluten-free: alas, barley does have gluten in it.)

Mmmmmm….

If you try it, let me know what you think!

 

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Where to start?

by eileen on January 29, 2012

When I read The China Study I became massively motivated to make changes in my life. I knew I wanted to cut out quite a few foods from our family diet, but it seemed way too overwhelming to do it all at once.

So I started very slowly, by adding small amounts of healthier foods to to our lives. I didn’t worry too much at the beginning about restricting any foods. Those faded away later.

Here’s the thing, if you really truly want to make a lifelong change: you have time.

You don’t have to worry right now about the fact that you can’t imagine giving up cheese, or chicken, or whatever it is.

When you add food that truly nourishes you, you are literally re-assembling the molecules in your body. By the time you get to that step that scares you, you’ll be thinking with a different brain, in a different body, with different cravings.

You don’t have to worry about the finish line, just take the first step.

Okay, enough philosophizing. What’s the first step?

If you want my opinion (and really, that’s all you’ll get since this is my blog, ha!) I would say  buy a Vitamix and make green smoothies.

Why green smoothies?

Ahhh, green smoothies.

If you are anything like me, you may have been cruising along not eating very many vegetables. I won’t get into why leafy greens are the most powerful, essential nutrient-rich food you can eat–there are plenty of places to do that research (I recommend the book Green for Life for a quick read on how amazing green leafies are.)

The main appeal of green smoothies for me is this:  you will get the benefits of green leafy vegetables easily and quickly. If you drink one of these every day or as close to every day as you can, you will start to crave vegetables. You’ll be nourishing the molecules in your body, creating a new container.

Why a vitamix?

There are all sorts of gadgets and equipment that can make vegan cooking easier and more appealing. A juicer…a food processor…even a dehydrator…all wonderful. But if you’re going to make an investment at the beginning, I would choose the Vitamix for several reasons:

  • It blends really, really smoothly. No weird chunks or grittiness. You haven’t had a green smoothie until you’ve had one made in a vitamix.
  • It’s really, really strong so nothing gets stuck, you can put in a whole carrot and it will handle it just fine.
  • It (mostly) doubles as a food processor, so in addition to the quintessential green smoothie, you can experiment with other things like oatmeal bars and yum sauce.

Okay, you have a vitamix. Now what?

The internet is full of recipes for green smoothies, and seriously they are all fantastic. Throw a bunch of greens into your vitamix with some fruit and you really can’t go wrong.

However, I know when I’m trying something new I like to have step-by-step directions to follow–so that’s what I’m going to share here. This is by no means a definitive smoothie recipe, just an easy one that works well for us.

Here is my go-to recipe:

This recipe makes enough for me and my husband to each have a 16 oz smoothie, and for about 6 oz to go in Zane’s cup. We drink this every morning (rotating the type of greens and the type of milk every week).

System notes:

  • (*) Buy a few bunches of kale or other greens, wash and separate into single servings and store them in the freezer. In the morning just pull out a bag of frozen kale. This is why my recipe does not call for ice. Also: it limits the greens-going-bad-in-the-fridge guilt if you skip a few days of smoothie-making. (Aiy, vegetable guilt! it’s the worst!)
  • Blend the frozen greens with the milk and any powders first, then add the fruit and blend again. I’m nut sure why but this tends to make everything come out smoother.
  • I like this recipe because it doesn’t have a lot of exotic fruit–bananas and apples are easy to keep on hand and don’t go bad very quickly (if your bananas are about to go bad you can freeze those too)
  • Also, this recipe doesn’t require much cutting or chopping in the mornings.
  • You can always just start with the fruit, greens and non-dairy milk and forget about the protein powder, amazing grasses, and hemp seeds to start with. They’re expensive, and you can always optimize later, I just wanted to show how we raise the protein and nutrient content.
  • In the beginning it’s just about getting in the habit of making a smoothie every morning (or afternoon, or whenever). Just start.
  • Get those greens in the little ones! Zane has been enjoying green smoothies since about six months old. I used to spoon feed them to him and it was his absolute favorite food. Now he is very insistent when it’s time for his smoothie!

If you give it a try, let me know how it goes! Or if you have a favorite smoothie recipe, do share…

 

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Love Bites #3

by eileen on January 26, 2012

A weekly list of things I love and what’s going on with me.

The intrepid among you will notice: no new posts this week. That’s because of the snow last week.

Z goes to a care-share co-op three (precious!) afternoons a week, and that’s when I get my writing done. Co-op closed for snow=no writing. I’m still trying to find my groove again.

However I did still find time to play around on the internet!  Here are a few things that I’m loving…

I’ll talk more about my strange and surprising love for Alicia Silverstone in another post (soon!) but for now I want to share this series on vegan pregnancy from her Kind Life blog: check out part one, part two, and part three.

This article on night weaning brought a huge lightbulb moment for me with regards to “sleep training,” attachment parenting, and where the two meet (thanks Chris!)

Once again, thanks for being here reading my new baby-blog!

Next week I’ll be talking about:  where to get started with eating healthy, coffee substitutes, and why I do in fact love Alicia Silverstone quite a bit–I mean, other than for her work in Clueless (as if!)

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Love Bites #2

by eileen on January 19, 2012

A weekly list of things I love and what’s going on with me.

I don’t often read something and think “wow, they put into words exactly what I wanted to say.”

But that is what I felt when I read this: Rebirth: What We Don’t Say.

You will die when you become a mother and it will hurt and it will be confusing and you will be someone you never imagined and then, you will be reborn. 

If you are a mother (or thinking about becoming one, or know and love someone who is a mother, so pretty much if you are anybody) I recommend you give it a read.

Margaret Cho is fierce and angry and beautiful.

We deserve beauty, love, respect, admiration, kindness and compassion. If we don’t get it, there will be hell to pay. I am no saint, but I am here for you and me. I am here for us, and I am doing the best I can.

Also, I don’t know if you heard, but…it snowed in Seattle? (Sorry–we do tend to talk about it quite a bit when it happens.)

So other than trekking out for coffee and supplies we’ve been house-bound all week. This happens to have coincided with Zane getting pretty serious about this whole walking gig. Which means this week will always look something like this in my memory:

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Wordless Wednesday: Cralking

by eileen on January 17, 2012

Taking a breath and calming the mental chatter once a week.

On a dry day in Seattle winter, One Must Go to the Park:

That shot totally cracks me up. Popup baby.

I’m so glad I captured this! (See, wordless wednesday is paying off already!) This is Zane’s latest thing, he’s half-walking half-crawling (wrawling?…walling?…cralking?). I’m not sure it’s any more efficient than crawling but it is pretty hilarious to watch.

After this, he started taking more frequent steps, so I think he will be full-on walking in the next couple of weeks. Yikes. Does that mean he’s not a baby anymore????

And, finally a good shot of his eye color. Hazel?

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Vegan Yum Sauce

by eileen on January 17, 2012

What is really yummy, can be used on just about anything, and is a great transitional food when letting go of cheese?

Yum sauce! Basically, yum sauce makes everything better.

The best way I can describe the flavor is cheese-meets-citrus-meets-hummus.

The inspiration for this sauce comes from Cafe Yumm, a healthy fast food franchise in Oregon. If you are ever in Oregon and need proof that you can eat delicious plant-based meals, just stop by a Cafe Yumm and order a vegan yumm bowl. (I dropped the extra ‘m” from my recipe since it seems a little twee to me.)

Here’s my best attempt at re-creating their sauce. I dare anyone to make this sauce and tell me they can’t live without cheese.

Ingredients:
1/2 cup olive oil
1/2 cup almonds
1/2 cup water
1/2 cup lemon juice (about 2 lemons)
1/3 cup nutritional yeast
1 can garbanzo beans, drained*
2 cloves garlic
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp cumin
1/4 tsp chili powder
1/4 tsp turmeric
* In the US “Eden Organics” is the only brand of canned beans that does not have BPA in the cans. So try to buy those! If you can’t find them, try beans in a carton.
Directions:

Blend ingredients in a Vitamix or food processor. And, wa-la!

Options:
For a slightly creamier sauce, reduce the garbanzo beans to half a can and add about 1/4 cup of silken tofu. (This was the original recipe, but since I don’t use silken tofu for anything else I dislike the half-empty carton of tofu going bad in my fridge everytime I make this.)

Substitutions:
One time I was out of almonds I used cashews instead and it was fine. Maybe even a bit better.

So–where to use this?…Oh! The places (this sauce) will go!

The Yum Bowl: Brown rice or barley, yum sauce, black or pinto beans, salsa, avocado slices. I could eat this every night for a week.

Yummy Mac: Use over brown rice pasta (or any other healthy pasta) for a quick mac-n-cheese substitute. Good for the kiddos.

Veggie burgers: This is an awesome topping for a veggie burger. (I’ll share my veggie burger recipe as soon as I perfect it–we’re currently working our way through a batch of 20 veggie burgers that I made and froze but which weren’t quite “right.” Ah well.)

Yum sauce will last about a week in the fridge. Though ours has never made it that long.

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