Comments on: Feeling feelings is hard

By: Eileen

Eileen — Tue, 08 Dec 2009 23:40:08 +0000

Thanks for the support you guys. It’s so cool to know you truly get it.

Tatty, I love that quote! Thank you!

Lots of love,
~ Eileen

By: Eileen

Eileen — Tue, 08 Dec 2009 23:38:58 +0000

Amber, I am in awe over how people do this with kids hanging on their every word. I can’t even imagine (though I hope to experience someday!)

By: Michelle Russell

Michelle Russell — Fri, 04 Dec 2009 19:33:40 +0000

Eileen, thank you SO MUCH for this. Because I suspect the Thing you’re talking about is the same one I’ve been agonizing over, and have ultimately decided against pursuing, all for pretty much the same reasons. (And if it’s not the same Thing, you’re psychic because this couldn’t have been more apropos!)

This was also the crux of it for me:
“But if I don’t take this opportunity, then I can’t have it, period.
I get other things. Like, money. And time. Space. *Calmness.*
But I don’t get this thing.”

I’ve been thinking about how much joy and learning AND how much financial, mental and emotional stress I’d be receiving if I were to make the choice to have this Thing. And the mental tug-of-war I was going through was agonizing, before I (verrrrrry reluctantly) made the decision to say no to it.

But you’ve expressed it so clearly and concisely:
“Because I’d feel *other, different* hard feelings if I pursued the thing. Either way there is loss.”

Thank you for that reminder. It makes me feel . . . not less sad, but more accepting. Relieved. Thanks.

By: Wormy

Wormy — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 21:25:09 +0000

Hi Eileen

Oh yes, feeling the feelings *is* confoundingly hard. To sit with them and not try to change them, fade them, fix them as you say, feels at times, impossible.
And yet, the way you are open to this process, gentle and accepting of the hard, is a beautiful thing and full of grace (even if it may not feel it!)

My heart goes out to you and I wish you exactly what you need right now from this. Although I imagine that is no comfort what so ever.
.-= Wormy´s last blog ..Unexpected Progress =-.

By: Chris Zydel

Chris Zydel — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 19:50:12 +0000

Dear Eileen,

So beautiful and heartfelt and WISE!! Yes, just because we make a choice that is right for us in certain ways doesn’t mean we won’t feel grief for what we lose in making that choice. My heart goes out to you as you ache for the shiny thing you won’t get to have, but I also really applaud you for making room for all of your feelings and all of who you are.
.-= Chris Zydel´s last blog ..Why I Don’t Believe In The Whole Idea Of Bad Art =-.

By: Tatty Franey

Tatty Franey — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 09:48:56 +0000

wow, this is just… touching, and beautiful.
I read somewhere the other day:
“You have to give up something to be really great at anything. And then you have to do the hell out of whatever’s left standing.” (It might be Rumi quote, or Martha Graham – i’ve been reading a lot at the same time and the brain mushes it all up.)
That quote gave me comfort, the same way your post did. Yep, we have to choose, and by gods it’s hard and it hurts, but we come out the other end.
Take care

By: Amber

Amber — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 04:36:11 +0000

I have to turn down things often because of my children. Which comes with the gig, and I understand that. But still, I feel the feelings and it’s not much fun. But you’re right, they’re OK, they’re not a sign that you’ve done the wrong thing, and they don’t last forever.
.-= Amber´s last blog ..What I Learned in November 2009 =-.

By: Fabeku

Fabeku — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 00:40:49 +0000

You’ve managed to articulate hard stuff in a really brilliant and beautiful way. And I really appreciate that. And you.

By: Gina

Gina — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 00:11:20 +0000

What can I say to this? Except, yes. And thank you. {hug} .-= Gina´s last blog ..House in the House! =-.